Day 3, Part Two: Cosmo doesn’t know shit from shinola when it comes to BDSM and kink.

In the article “Whips, Chains, Cages…Whoa” (page 52), Cosmo does a bang-up job about making a bunch of assumptions about people in the BDSM/kink lifestyle. The main ideas are:

1. “S&M” is dark and perverted, and involves a lot of PVC and barbed wire.

2. Stars like Shakira, Christina Aguliera, and Rhianna are using kink related themes in order to compete with “viral video stars”.

3. All kinky guys are dominant, all kinky girls are submissive, and if you enjoy giving/receiving pain, there is something wrong with you.

Holly over at the Pervocracy goes much farther in depth about why appropriating aspects of BDSM without knowing what it’s all about, and making gross generalizations about BDSM/kink is so messed up. Please read her article, because she explains this BS far better than I could. You can come back here once you’re done.

Cosmo seems to be what happens when the girl in high school who slut-shamed anyone who had sex, but gave out blowjobs like candy* grows up. So far I’ve learned that I’m supposed to be having a lot of sex, dressing sexily, having sexy hair, wearing sexy makeup, but not having any sort of sex that might include giving or receiving pain, or getting marked in the process. Because doing so means that I have Deep Seated Emotional Problems. Wait–did my ex Steve write this?

Cosmo does like to bring forth a lot of “experts” (with PhDs) for their sex articles. Why doesn’t Cosmo ask regular people? Or popular sex educators? Or any of the five million sex bloggers? You know, people who give honest advice, and aren’t interested in shaming people?

I dunno, maybe they asked Steve to ghostwrite this crap because he didn’t charge much.

*Before you accuse me of stereotyping, I did go to college with this girl. Her defense was that performing oral “wasn’t really sex”. Headdesk.

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2 Responses to Day 3, Part Two: Cosmo doesn’t know shit from shinola when it comes to BDSM and kink.

  1. Laura says:

    Love the idea for a blog, great job so far! Funny stuff, I enjoy reading it and will continue to!!

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